This morning Her Majesty Queen Elizabeth and His Royal Highness the Duke of Edinburgh will host a breakfast for expatriates, those on witness protection schemes and property developers seeking asylum in the UK at Farmleigh, Dublin.

After breakfast, HRH the Duke of Edinburgh will join the First Gentleman of Ireland for a race around Áras an Uachtaráin on lawnmowers, while Her Majesty will engage in witty banter with An tUachtarán na hÉireann on the subject of their Royal Highnesses Beatrice and Eugenie’s headwear at the wedding of their Royal Highnesses William and Catherine.

The Royal Party will thence process to the Guinness brewery at St James’ Gate, where Her Majesty, as High Admiral of the Royal Navy and HRH the Duke of Edinburgh will order that the yardarm on HMS Victory be lowered to better facilitate the sun.

The party will visit Croke Park, the scene of the historic all-British Tyrone v Armagh All-Ireland Gaelic Football final in 2003. Her Majesty will unveil a plaque to Peter ‘The Great’ Canavan and His Royal Highness will accompany the First Gentleman in appraising a number of under-21 Camogie Teams from the Leinster Region.

After a presentation at the Hill 16 Pub of a bottle of Jameson 16 year old malt, the Duke of Edinburgh will join in a singalong of ‘Some Say the Devil is Dead’ and ‘The Men Behind The Wire’.

An evening circular will be released as permitted.