In the absence of a solid and logical method to undertake a necessary reshuffle, it falls yet again to me to do Sir Keir Starmer’s job for him. Here, then, is the perfect cabinet for Starmer, drawing only on the principles of nominative determinism, assuming these people haven’t all given up their seats for Andy Burnham by the time the reshuffle happens.

Note that I couldn’t think of anyone for Attorney General, Wales, Scotland or Northern Ireland.

  1. Cabinet Office – Alison McGovern
  2. Department for Business and Trade. – Polly Billington
  3. Department for Culture, Media and Sport – Amanda Hack
  4. Department for Education – Joani Reid and Rosie Wrighting
  5. Department for Energy Security and Net Zero – Jacob Collier
  6. Department for Environment, Food and Rural Affairs – Emma Foody, Gen Kitchen, Jodie Gosling, Peter Lamb
  7. Department for Science, Innovation and Technology – Jen Craft
  8. Department for Transport – Michael Wheeler
  9. Department for Work and Pensions – Lorraine Beavers, Sarah Sackman
  10. Department of Health and Social Care – Andy Slaughter, John Healey, Melanie Ward
  11. Foreign, Commonwealth and Development Office – Catherine West
  12. Chancellor of the Exchequer – Marie Goldman
  13. Financial Secretary to the Treasury – Anna Gelderd
  14. Home Office: Olivia Bailey (This requires a working knowledge of Gaelic to be amusing)
  15. Ministry of Defence – Natalie Fleet
  16. Ministry of Housing, Communities and Local Government – Chris Ward
  17. Ministry of Justice – Baggy Shanker. (Prisons, esp.)