Gordon Brown has hailed the abilities of his ‘friend’ Brian Cowen, Taoiseach (Prime Minister) of Ireland.

Brown, whose past benedictions have destroyed the British banking sector, the car industry and the value of Sterling, declared:

“Nobody deserves greater credit for this than my friend Brian Cowen. He brought great patience, he brought huge tenacity, he brought good humour and he brought great skill. This settlement would not have happened without the levels of co-operation between the Irish and British governments”

By my reckoning this gives Cowen about three weeks to live.