The Irish General Election will be called this
Tuesday Wednesday (lazy bastards), either for Friday 26 February or Thursday 25 February 2016. Jelly and ice cream, anyone?
In preparation for the tidal wave of bollocksology, nonsense, bullshit, jingoism and nationalism, nábídána.com, known universally for its embrace of Irish cultural values and not at all predisposed to being nasty and petty about politics in the 26 counties, will offer unrivaled coverage and analysis of whenever politicians screw up.
This election is the first since the emergence of the country from the worst economic crisis since the last one, and the first time Fine Gael has a reasonable chance to take power for a second successive term. It take place in the centenary year of the ENTIRELY SUCCESSFUL (apparently) Easter Rising of 1916 and marks probably the most exciting weekend for Michael Lowry TD since Trabolgan in July 2001.
In order to ensure our enormous audience is not discomfited or rendered nauseous by cognitive dissonance occasioned by suddenly appearing to give a fiddler’s about our new (very temporary) focus, and in order to ensure nobody expects fair and balanced reporting, please be aware of the following biases of this site:
- We won’t be nice about Sinn Féin, and we will probably try to ignore them as much as possible. Least said about them, soonest mended
- Fianna Fáil clearly have the word ‘Fail’ in their name, so we will probably play on that as if it were a legitimate pun, in the absence of anything constructive to write
- Fine Gael clearly has the word ‘Fine’ in the title, so we’ll probably treat them as if they’re almost okay, although their politics are fairly atrocious. They think they’re to the right of centre. BLESS
- Direct Democracy Ireland = LAUGHS GALORE. Constant Markievicz gave his life in a game of hurling so those lads could make us chuckle daily
- Ní thiocfaidh bhur lá.